Can I Clock Out Every Once in Awhile?

 I love being a stay at home mom and I know I have it good. For the most part, I let G’s whimper in the monitor be my alarm clock in the morning and I am so grateful that we can snuggle, play, and take our time getting the day started instead of rushing to daycare and a full day of work. I love being with my baby for all his giggles and grins, cries and even his dirty diapers. I know that there are a lot of moms who would kill to be in my position and then there are others that would go stir crazy. Grayson is my full time (with lots and lots of overtime) job, and I love my job.

 But every once in awhile, I need a break. I need to take my mommy timecard and clock out.

And by a break, I don’t mean the few hours every afternoon when he’s napping. I mean I need to get out of the house and not be in charge.

Ryan works really, really hard so I can stay home with Grayson. He leaves the house at 5:30 AM and on a non-game night, gets home around 6:30 PM. If he has a game, it could be anywhere from 9:00 to after midnight when he rolls in. During football season, he works 7 days a week and softball season (now) usually 6 days. He loves coaching and he loves his family, but it’s frustrating to have him gone so much. It makes me sad that he sees so little of his son during the week (I try so hard to keep G awake until Daddy gets home but the little guy is so tuckered out by 6:00 that I’m often not successful).

I’m having a hard time with Ryan’s job. Like I said before, I need to get out of the house. I am trying so hard to learn to be a decent cook, but taking Grayson to the grocery store is difficult- he can’t sit up in the cart and doesn’t tolerate the snap-and-go stroller very well. I desperately need to get my eyebrows waxed and my hair cut, but obviously can’t do that with a baby.

I do have help- family has been wonderful and I’ve had lots of offers from friends willing to help. I need to get better about taking friends up on their offers. Why is it so hard to ask for and accept help?

I saw my counselor today- she suggested (as have several other people) that I look into a mother’s day out program. She helped me realize that if I had some time for me I will probably be less resentful of Ryan’s hours at work. She was also very happy to hear that we’ve decided that Ryan is not going to teach summer school this year. I’m excited to have him home to have some real family time, at least for about 6 weeks until football season starts.

I really hope this doesn’t sound like I’m whining. Sometimes I feel really guilty that I feel overwhelmed and stressed and want time away, because I’m getting to do the job that I’ve always wanted. But everyone should have some time off-right?

Just wanted to share a little adorableness…Ryan’s mom stayed with G today when I went to my appointment- this is what I came home to. Oh, he is just so darn cute.

4 Comments

  1. Esperanza on April 29, 2011 at 3:12 am

    I would LOVE to be a stay at home mom. But if I were one, I would absolutely need time off. Without a doubt. I feel like I need to take time off now as it is, but I feel like I'm already seeing Isa so little that I don't want to take time off from her and I see Mi.Vida so little I don't want to take time off from him. And I can't take time off from work (at least not this year, as I'll loss my pay if I do).I was just sobbing to Mi.Vida the other day that I felt like I could never turn off. He had gotten a sick day with child care so he got to stay at home in bed all day and I was SO JEALOUS of him. I hadn't realized how overwhelmed I felt by all my hats and never getting a break. I just lost it talking to him about it. That was when I realized I need to be better about getting breaks for myself, some how, some way.I think if you can swing it you should definitely take a break. Making it regular would be great, so you could plan appointments and just know you're going to have that time to look forward to it. I hope you can work it out! No one works harder than a stay at home mom! Good luck getting a break!

  2. Michael and Erin on April 29, 2011 at 3:20 am

    Amen sister. You know I agree 100%, this is the most rewarding and wonderful job EVER and do I want to go back to the corporate world, NOPE, but some days are hard. I usually work a 7-7 shift…and that is without overtime or an early wake up, late night, and that is one long day! For sure look into the Mother's Day Out Program, hope you can find one nearby and get a few hours a week. And whoo hoo to no summer school and some good family time this summer!

  3. Sarah on April 29, 2011 at 4:03 am

    Girl, I feel you. Being a SAHM is so rewarding, but it is by far the most demanding job I've ever, ever had. And I promise, even when they can sit up in the cart, it isn't much easier – then they're trying to open boxes and knock stuff off shelves! I miss the days I could put L in his wrap or infant seat and he'd sleep through shopping!And as I sit here with yucky hair, nails, and feet desperately in need of a pedicure – I offer no answers but total sympathy!

  4. Traci on April 29, 2011 at 2:12 pm

    I echo Erin and Sarah! Staying at home is something I wouldn't trade for anything, but my goodness…..can I at least have an hour to get a spray tan or pedicure? Can I go to the grocery store and come home with items I can actually put together to make a meal with? aaaahhhhhh!!!!

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