Thank you so much for your comments on my last post- your encouragement means so much to me and I have reread them so many times and they truly have lifted me up.
I am doing better. I’m officially in the second trimester and like magic, I am feeling SO much better. I’m still tired and hungry all the time, but I will take that over nausea and puking. (I’m hoping I didn’t just jinx myself by writing this).
And, not surprisingly, feeling better physically really has changed my outlook on everything else. Grayson’s difficult phase doesn’t seem so unbearable, and I find myself more excited than anxious about his little brother or sister most of the time.
Another thing that was bothering me was the amount of hours we have nursing care. I do not in any way want to seem ungrateful for the help I have now. It is so nice having the freedom to work, run errands, or just rest without having to worry about childcare. Our nurse is great, but I was and still am, having a hard time adjusting to not being with Grayson all day every day like I have for almost 2 years. I got a call last week from our agency informing me that we qualify for even more hours than we have right now. I really do not want someone in my house 60 hours/week. I am a stay at home mom because I choose to be- I want to be the primary caretaker of my children. Yes, I need a break, and yes, I admit I need help, but not that much. I also do not want someone different taking care of G each week (as we’ve had the past 3 Sundays)- I don’t think it’s good for him at all. So today I talked to our nurse and am going to try and work it out so she works 2 days during the week and the weekends. We won’t have anyone Sunday mornings (because our nurse goes to church) but I was missing bringing G to church with us anyway. I’m hesitant to reduce our hours too much though, because I know when the baby arrives, I will need all the help I can get!
Grayson is doing a little bit better too. The past few days, he’s taken decent naps (1-2 hours) and yesterday and today he slept until almost 7 am. He’s still waking up at least once a night crying, which I can’t figure out. Last night he cried and cried and when I went to pick him up, it was obvious he wasn’t awake. His body was thrashing and he just kept crying. Night terror? Seizure? I am planning on changing some things to try and make the sleeping thing better: blackout curtains for the nursery, a louder sound machine, sleep sack and weighted blanket. Any other suggestions?
The genetic results are finally in! The lab will not release them to us and G’s Mito specialist is still on maternity leave and won’t release them until she reviews them, so I called G’s neurologist and begged for an appointment sooner than our August 27 scheduled one. They squeezed us in tomorrow, so hopefully we will get lots of useful information! In addition to the results, I have a long list of questions and concerns for him, especially since we still haven’t talked to a doctor about the MRI and spinal tap he had in May.
Hoping to have a big update tomorrow!
All those that read my wives blog I think you so much. She is an amazing mother and I wonder everyday how she does it. Grayson and I are so blessed to have her in our lives. Grayson has improved so much and I know it is because he has such a great mother and so many answered prayers. God has blessed us with an amazing child who is going to do so much in this world and when you think you have it all he just keeps giving. I love you Elizabeth and I love my little blessing. Thank you for being you!!!
Ahhh so sweet comment. Proud daddy and husband.. Just wanted to say that I was thinking about you and your family.. And that my mother in law made Carter a giant sleep sack. He is still in it and Emma would sleep in one too if she could. Let me know if you want me to have my mother in law make one for G.. You can pick the fabric and mail to her if you want too.. So glad you are feeling better..
So glad you're feeling better! Not puking makes all the difference in the world!!! And you have the best husband in the world – seriously!!!Very interested to read your update about the genetic testing!
What an emotional dilemma. I don't have near the situation you do, but I find myself feeling the same way about help as you. During the time that it's just me, I often think, "I just need a break – a small break," but then when B is home and tells me to go do something for myself and take that much needed break, then I don't really want it. I love the help, but I miss my boy… even for a couple hours. I hate leaving him even when it's what I need.I'm so glad you're feeling better!I'm hopeful for you that you get all sorts of useful information tomorrow. And in regards to the sleep thing – I have no advice but I find it interesting that you mentioned the weighted blanket. I SWEAR Matthew sleeps better with a heavier blanket on top of him in his little sleep sack!
Baby E's been having weird crying/screaming at night lately, too. Maybe it's the age? Also, sooooo glad you're feeling better!!!!!!
Elizabeth – I'm so happy to hear that things are getting better. It sounds like you're making some great adjustments for G's sleep too. Is he by chance teething? I always forget the "normal kid" problems happen too. I can't wait to hear about the test results!!! Saying a lot of prayers for you guys. Lori
So glad you're feeling better! And I can't wait to hear the results!!!! Fingers crossed. Also, could you explain to the nurse that *right now* you need less help, but that with no warning at all you could go into labor and need way more help? I think they should be flexible like that considering. 🙂 *hugs*
So so happy that things are looking up and you feel better, it makes all the difference in the world to be able to make it through the days! So glad he is sleeping better again too! Whoo hoo!