Sweet Baby Boy,

What is the deal with you and the month of September? You were born last September, and we just celebrated  your birthday last week- isn’t that enough (good) excitement for one month? Do we really have to add terrifying medical scares to the mix? Last year, you were rushed to the ER and had your very first ambulance ride, and last night, we had a repeat performance. Here’s what happened:

You were really fussy all day yesterday- at first I thought you might be getting ready to cut another tooth (when are you going to do that, by the way? It’s been months since a new one made its appearance). Fussy, snotty nose, diarrhea, low grade fever- I was sure I was right. We had Physical Therapy in the morning, and you screamed through the whole thing. The rest of the day we basically spent on the couch, and you switched between crying and napping.

By the afternoon your fever peaked at 102.8. High for you (you always run low, just like I do), but from everything I’ve read and heard from my mommy friends, not dangerous. Then I remembered there were 5 kids sent home from your daycare class on Monday with Hand, Foot and Mouth disease. You didn’t have any sores, but I figured maybe they were coming and you just had the other symptoms. I decided not to call Dr. D (cue mommy guilt) because if it was a virus or teething, there was nothing she was going to be able to do. I’m so sorry I didn’t, little dude.

I put you to bed at 6:00 like usual, but you didn’t fall right to sleep as usual. You cried and cried. I went and got you and we sat and tried to watch some TV and I attempted to give you a bottle, which you refused. After about 15 minutes, I decided to put you back in your crib and let you cry it out. When you are tired, you don’t like to be rocked anyway; you just want to be in your bed with your thumb in your mouth. This time, you fell fast asleep.

At about 7:15 (I remember the time because I was about halfway into the Big Bang Theory) I heard you grunting in the monitor. It was a sound I’d never heard you make before. You do make a lot of noise while you’re sleeping  though, so I confess I didn’t go in  your room right away. The grunting didn’t stop, so I went in and noticed you were face down in your crib. I decided to attempt to turn you over on your back but when I lifted you up, you were soaking wet and your crib sheet was soaked. I picked you up and you were totally limp. I ran with you in my arms to the living room and was shocked- you were pale, your eyes rolled back, your lips trembling and you weren’t responding to me screaming your name at all. I immediately picked up my phone and dialed 911.

As I was talking to the 911 operator, I felt very calm inside. I knew I had to remain calm for you. However, listening to my own voice was like listening to someone else- I sounded hysterical. It really was like two different people in that room. After giving the operator our address, I hung up and paced with you from the front of the house to the back. You were moaning and would still not respond to me.  But then, even before the paramedics arrived, I knew the seizure was over and you were ok. You were still fussy and disoriented, but were breathing normally and looked more “normal”.

They took your vitals and then a few minutes later, we got in the ambulance. We both lay on the stretcher, you on top of me. The paramedic gave you both Tylenol and Ibuprofen on the way to the hospital. You do realize this was your second ambulance ride and  you are only 1 year and 1 week old, right?

At the hospital, they took blood (which of course with your tiny, almost nonexistent veins was no small feat), hooked you up to an IV, and did a CAT scan and chest X-Ray. All normal. The doctor came in and wanted to do a spinal tap to rule out meningitis. We refused. I know you don’t have meningitis and didn’t want to put you through that (again- you’ve already had 2 of those in your life). The doctor was not happy that we refused the spinal tap,and made me sign papers that we were going against medical advice, but I know we did the right thing.

You were “diagnosed” with a febrile seizure, but Dr. R, your neurologist, told me this would happen. That you are in another category and it may not be febrile. We couldn’t get him on the phone last night and I am waiting to hear from him this morning. You still feel crummy today- your fever is back up and you are having nasty diarrhea. We have an appointment this afternoon with Dr. D- I hope she can help us get you to feeling better!

So let’s make a deal now, Dude. NO MORE September drama, ok? You are totally, completely worth everything you make us go through, but seriously. September should be all about your birthday, not ambulance rides, hospital visits, and scaring your parents to death.

I love you so, so much and I’m so sorry you’re sick.

Love,
Mommy